Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Summer seems to be so far away...
I miss the smell of flowers, of grass, of strawberries and cherries. Even the sun has a smell; dusty, warm and lovely as it shines on your back, leaving shadows where your clothes are.
I miss the sound of whistling birds, the rustling of papers being turned, the screams of children in the cool water.
I miss sitting in the garden with a glass of sparkling wine, reading a book, feeling the sun warming your shoulders.
In my head, it's warm. I'm sitting in the sun in France, hearing the sound of the sea with sand between my toes. I'm sitting in the garden, having a barbecue party with my friends. I'm sitting on the porch, drinking tea with the ladies.
And at night, we are lying in bed together, clammy because of the heat, waiting for the thunder and the rain to refresh the day.
In my mind, the school year is over and we have all the time of the world to do what we want.
We sing, we dance, we swim and we lie down in the grass.
We travel, we see the world, and at the end, we come home and tell stories.
It's sweet, coming together at the end of the summer.
It's good to see how we changed and still are the same.
How we grew, experienced, saw.
How we remembered, missed and came back to our own lifes eventually.
Because there's nothing like home...
And after a few weeks, a few months, we all are together in class again, talking, laughing and having fun.
But I think that time is over when this school year ends.
There are new things waiting for us.
University, new cities, new friends.
Living on your own, going to college, becoming indepentant.
But before that time, we'll go through some things together. And even when we have parted, we still will be together. At least, in my mind we will.
'Cause in my mind, there is an eternal end of Summer...
I can still recall our last summer, I still see it all.
Walks along the Seine, laughing in the rain,
Our last summer, memories that remain.
We made our way along the river
And we sat down in the grass by the Eiffel tower.
I was so happy we had met, it was the age of no regret, oh yes.
Those crazy years, that was the time of the flower-power.
But underneath, we had a fear of flying,
Of getting old, a fear of slowly dying.
We took the chance like we were dancing our last dance
I can still recall our last summer, I still see it all
In the tourist jam, round the Notre Dame
Our last summer, walking hand in hand
- ABBA -
Sunday, January 15, 2012
I remember some moments of magic. The kind of moments when you wouldn't find yourself wondering if it started snowing glitter and stars suddenly.
It is the kind of moments time passes in a strange way. Faster, slower, faster again, and then it seems like it has stopped passing, just before it runs forward again.
You just can't put your finger on it, but something is special...
One moment comes, and then it's gone before you know it. But before it's gone, it's followed immediately by another. It's all put to order perfectly.
One laugh follows to another, one word flows into more words and you're dancing and floating and soaring over and through and in it.
It's the feeling you can do anything, be anyone, go anywhere.
And sometimes, just sometimes, it's not just a feeling, it's a fact.
You close your eyes and when you open them, you're at the beach in Saint-Tropez with diamonds and pearls in your hair. You close them again and suddenly you're watching yourself on a billboard at Broadway, everyone knowing your face.
Another blink and you're staring in a mirror, seeing yourself wearing the most beautifull dress you've ever seen, looking like a moviestar.
And suddenly, you blink for another time, and then you're all alone.
The sun rising in the sky, and there's only you, wearing nothing but underwear and your hair's a mess. There still is sparkling polish on your finger and toenails, there's a smudged line of eyeliner under your eyes. Your feet still hurt from the highest heels, your lips still show a hint of the red lipstick you wore, your dress lying on the chair across from your bed.
It's gone now, but there must have been something...
You're left with nothing but memories coming back to you slowly and a satisfying feeling.
Memories of how you danced, sung, laughed.
Images in your head of how you felt wonderful, beautiful, happy.
The feeling you're body was working on endorhins and sparkling champagne rather than on oxigen. Your head feeling light and nothing seemed to matter.
It must have been a wonderful night, and a lovely dream.
It seems like it's gone forever, but...
I want to invite you to a magical blur.
I want to take you to a place filled with miracles, with glitter and stars.
A place where everything is better, prettier, more for a while.
Enter it, be there for a moment, spend some time feeling wonderful and having fun. Dance, whirl around and enjoy.
It will bring great memories of even greater moments.
And with some good luck, there's a picture on the wall to bring it all back to you whenever you want.
'Cause eventually, it's just what it is without your fantasy...
I close my eyes and dream about a sunny holiday
I wish that I was beachin' down in Saint Tropez.
Or sitting in the lobby at the fabulous Pierre
With diamonds on my fingers and not a single care.
Instead I'm on the Avenue where nobody goes
With fields of green that wilted like a last summer rose.
Some people call it paradise, but I call it pain
Baby take me anywhere, but not here again.
Why am I sitting in the middle of nowhere?
Standing here with nothing to do
Wondering if I really love you, oh oh,
I guess that I do.
- Caro Emerald -
Sunday, January 1, 2012
I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas this year.
Lots of joy, pleasure and love. A good time with your family. The prettiest Christmas tree.
Everything you wished for and more.
I hope you celebrated and had a gorgeous New Year's Eve yesterday night, and that you can look back to a great year.
I had a party with some friends and we talked for a while about last year. It made me think of some special 2011-moments.
I did a lot of travelling, saw so many places I never saw before and fell in love with in.
Rome, with all the art, the buildings, the Italian ambiance, and all my friends from school. Secretly smoking cigarettes in the bathroom of our hotel room when we felt down the last day, talking and sharing our problems. The blisters on my feet from walking all day long for a week. The sun, the Colosseum, the Trevi-fountain.
Germany, a four week-trip from Bonn to a tiny town, from Munich to Berlin. How good it felt to see the sun again in Munich after two weeks of rain. How Berlin was pretty in both sunlight and rain. Cycling in Berlin, the wind blowing through my hair on a summer's evening, with people from all over the world. The museums, the busy days, and above all, the people.
And there were so much more lovely moments. Too much to mention. The year feels complete.
Eventually, this must be somewhat the same for everyone. We all had some good and some bad moments, but I hope there were more of the good ones.
And if you look back to the bad memories, I hope you notice you've learned something from them and have grown stronger.
Now all we have to do is looking forward. A new year, new chances, new possibilities.
New plans to make, new dreams to fulfill, new goals to achieve.
There are so many things waiting for me: My eighteenth birthday, graduation, the final-dance. Letting go of my high school friends, university, my driver's licence. A summer holiday to the south of France with my parents, sisters, my sister's sweetheart and my own.
I'm sure not everything will go according to plan.
But to be honest... It would be boring, and I would not want it any other way.
Happy new year.
Here’s to us one more toast and then we’ll pay the bill
Deep inside both of us can feel the autumn chill
Birds of passage, you and me
We fly instinctively
When the summer’s over and the dark clouds hide the sun
Neither you nor I’m to blame when all is said and done.
It’s so strange when you’re down and lying on the floor
How you rise, shake your head, get up and ask for more
Clear-headed and open-eyed
With nothing left untried
Standing calmly at the crossroads,no desire to run
There’s no hurry any more when all is said and done.
- ABBA -